Prey for the Hunted

Just when you think that companies had run out of tacky ways to help Rappers and Oil Magnates ruin individualize their ultra luxury cars you see something like this.  For a mere $25k (ish) a company called Alchemist will add the ultimate bling to your whip. We are talking about covering your car’s roof in 24k gold or platinum.

Sure adding gold to the roof of your car will make it marginally slower and it will handle worse,  but what it will really do is make you look like a silverspoon fed richie rich ass face who constantly needs attention and has something to prove because your daddy didn’t love you enough.

Unfortunately it is not a question of will these be popular but rather how popular. Two other questions also come to mind, how soon will it be before clever theives with sawsalls start making these golden chariots into convertibles and how long do I have to wait to see one of these on a honda civic.

Here it is folks the Bentley Brooklands, potentially the most powerful panty magnet on the planet. The Brooklands has supercar worthy power coming from its 6.75 liter twin turbo V8 making 530hp and 775 ft/lbs of torque but at 213 inches long and weighing 5800 pounds its dimensions are more like a Chevy Suburban than a Ferrari.

But what makes this car so powerful to the fairer sex? It is not the motor, more likely it is the Bentley’s imposing silhouette and the giant Winged “B” that adorns the hood, trunk and 20″ wheels. Is this because driving a Bentley says I can spend $340,000 on a car, or is there something more?

Most people and certainly most women don’t really know how ridiculously expensive the Brooklands may be but they can feel its presence, and they can see every persons’ head turn as it rolls down the street. Most people will never know that they are witnessing one of only 550 ever to be built rolling works of art. As you in invite you future supermodel girlfriend to take a ride in your car that cost more than most people’s home will she will be forced to note of your appreciation for luxury and craftsmanship more than just the dollars in your wallet.

Will she understand that it takes 16 dead cows, 120 hours, and 43,000 stitches to create the sumptuous interior she is sitting in? Will she understand that honing the rare burl woods for the dash and trim takes over a month, or that It takes two hours for one man just to braze the two pieces of the front fender together and then smooth the join to a seamless finish?

She won’t know these details but she will feel the majesty oozing from this car, and then she will most certainly feel like going home with you! Now all we need to worry about is George Clooney buying one of these, in which case all mens’ penises will be rendered useless.

More Photos after the jump

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Time for a little history for the fashion illiterate me 15 minutes ago .  In the early 1800’s Beau Brummell was considered the arbiter of British fashion and is credited with introducing and establishing the modern man’s suit, as well as being the genesis of Dandyism .  A dandy is a man who places particular importance upon physical appearance , refined language, and leisurely hobbies. Some say that Brummell would take as long as 5 hours to dress and that he had his boots regularly polished with champagne.

While Americans care dearly for how they look I wonder if it is possible to have this level of luxury and value of the aesthetic in today’s quick and easy society. In America it seems, that even among the best dressed, we have a commodotized vision of luxury.  Europeans understand and honor bespoke tailoring , a term originating from Savile Row, and seem to see beyond the clever marketing that is trying to pass off prestigious monikers and high price tags as luxury. Tom Ford played his part in creating this problem and is no set on being part of the solution.

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